Dorian – Pakt mit dem Teufel (2003)

Dorian – Pakt mit dem Teufel: Directed by Allan A. Goldstein. With Malcolm McDowell, Ethan Erickson, Victoria Sanchez, Ron Lea. A modern retelling of the Oscar Wilde novel.

“Basically, transporting it to a modern day setting should be enough to do the trick. Christ on a stick, this was a lamentable film. It will never be the worst film ever, nor is it so badly made it sucks hairy balls. But given the fact this was based on Oscar Wildeu0026#39;s u0026quot;The Picture of Dorian Grayu0026quot;, they sure turned it into an atrocity.u003cbr/u003eu003cbr/u003eThe easiest thing to do, was to set the story in the world of models u0026amp; fashion photography (eternal youth u0026amp; beauty, right?). Yawn, how original. Furthermore, this film suffers that hard from looking u0026quot;so ninetiesu0026quot;, that it hurts. A lot. Ridiculous and worn-out fashion concepts, the photo-shoots are so clichéd (and you should see the result – no artistic value whatsoever), a lot of uninspired pop/rock songs for no reason on the soundtrack, lots of cheap but oh-so-hip at the time editing effects, glossy u0026amp; shallow sensuality, polished soft sex scenes, art-farty u0026#39;beau mondeu0026#39; parties, an artificial fragrance of decadence,… Should I go on?u003cbr/u003eu003cbr/u003eIu0026#39;ve seen decadence in the world of fashion portrayed with more flair in a grotesque B-flick like u0026quot;Night Angelu0026quot; (1990). Iu0026#39;ve seen art, photography, evil u0026amp; mirrors handled better in horror sequel romp like u0026quot;Amityville: A New Generationu0026quot; (1993). You think those are great movies? That should say enough about how good a job this u0026quot;Dorianu0026quot; did on a classic story. Iu0026#39;ve also seen great Edgar Allan Poe stories all mangled up and poured into some u0026#39;sorority girlsu0026#39; slasher-format in u0026quot;Buried Aliveu0026quot; (1990), not exactly the most faithful of adaptations. But Iu0026#39;m sure if theyu0026#39;d turned this u0026quot;Dorianu0026quot; into a slasher, it would have been a better stupid movie.u003cbr/u003eu003cbr/u003eYou can tell Malcolm McDowell had some fun playing his part, as Dorianu0026#39;s (evil) mentor, but itu0026#39;s far less fun seeing him play it. The whole film pretty much bores you along, and so does McDowell after a while.u003cbr/u003eu003cbr/u003eHave the Hughes Brothers make a new u0026quot;Dorian Grayu0026quot; movie with a Victorian London setting and give us decent adaptation. It would be for more pleasing looking forward to such a project than suffering through the umpteenth unimaginative Hollywood re-make of any given horror film these days. Or maybe I could check out that 2009 version with Colin Firth. It surely should have more appeal than this trite.”