Devils of War (2013)

Devils of War: Directed by Eli Dorsey. With Lawrence Anthony, Jerry L. Buxbaum, Jamin Watson, Jeremiah Grace. Poland, 1944. Assembled for a top-secret rescue mission, a daring team of Special Forces soldiers quickly find themselves trapped deep behind enemy lines.

“The cover of the DVD announces this film as u0026quot;A cult classic – Iron Sky meets Outpostu0026quot; so I bought it in eager anticipation. What an idiot! I can barely even begin to articulate how much this statement overstates the artistic merit of this 72 minutes of rubbish. I knew I was in trouble from the beginning with the hilarious u0026quot;special effectsu0026quot; of the burning plane but I thought I would give it the benefit of the doubt and soldier on in the hope that it would get better. I kind of stayed with it until the hilarious back projection bit with the girl on the motorbike, which is a classic Ed Wood moment, and it was at this point my will to stay with it was seriously evaporating. Once we got to the bit with the virgin begging the soldier to relieve of her affliction in order to save herself from the Nazis I crumbled and gave up. OK, I suppose I should have carried on until the end in order to review this but I expect most people who stumble upon this cinematic train-wreck will concur with me that getting to the end of this is like having teeth pulled.u003cbr/u003eu003cbr/u003eFor those living in Blighty do not be tempted by the fact that it is a fiver in the bargain bin at Tesco (I expect it will remain in there for some time as I doubt there will be many takers). Take my advice if you are momentarily tempted as you trail pass the DVDs and go buy some booze instead – the experience of a fine bottle of Albanian chardonnay will be much more memorable than this film, believe me (and at least the label on the bottle probably does not misrepresent the contents).”